I remember an old song that we would sing at church growing up. In fact, when I hear it in my head, it's in my mom's voice. It's taken pretty much verbatim from Isaiah 40:31:
They that wait upon the LORD
shall renew their strength;
they shall mount up with wings as eagles;
they shall run, and not be weary;
they shall walk and not faint.
with the added phrase:
Teach me Lord, teach me Lord, to wait.
Whether or not we know how to wait gracefully, we've been asked to wait on several rather significant things of late. We're still not able to try again for babies, we don't have any idea when or where Dan may find a job, we don't know where we may be living in a few weeks, and a whole lot of things about the future seem to just get a resounding "wait" when we ask what to do.
My parents will tell you that patience has never been my strong point. However, the moments I decide that it's okay to just be here waiting -- to not have the answers, and to not demand to have them or to force the issue of what we will do by just launching out and doing something without any sense of conviction that it is the right thing -- the more I discover that it is somehow all okay. The bills are getting paid, the roof is still over our head and we are finding that our attitudes about a lot of things are subtly different than they were before.
Case in point: Daniel says that for the first time in his life he dreads the weekend and that Monday can't come quickly enough. I, on the other hand, still start dreading Monday on Friday afternoon, but the effect is mitigated by the same factors that have driven the change in Dan. For him, the weekday means new possibilities for work leads and developments -- interviews, calls with feedback and other hope-wielding moments. For me, the weekday still spells more stress and the routine of work, work, work. But I find myself impatient to know what the latest is every time caller ID shows one of the numbers I now recognize as his recruiters, and I sometimes wish that the weekend weren't such a wasteland, because it's the time we have to think about all we don't yet know.
Still, we're happy. We're still prone to break out in impromptu dancing in the grocery store aisle. We're still talking to each other and giggling often. We're still sickening some of our acquaintances with our rather newlywed zeal. We ARE rather impatient for the next step to be revealed, but we are also discovering that waiting is not the worst thing we could be asked to do.
Now that we've learned that lesson... isn't it about time to get on with things? ;)
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9 comments:
I definately say it is... "Come on Lord, please tell us the answers(but only the ones we want to hear)!
I can't remember hearing that song. Mom did sing:
Have patience, have patience;
Don't be in such a hurry.
When you get impatient
You only start to worry.
Remember, remember, that God is patient, too.
And think of all the times when others had to wait for you.
I definitely prefer the lyrics to your song!
I, too, struggle with patience. In reading John I am amazed at how patient Jesus was towards His disciples. If He can be that patient with rebelious me, why can't I be more patient for His perfect timing?
Today I read and cherished:
"Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful."
Hang in there. God will continue to give you life abundantly!
P.S. I'm glad you are still giddy newly-weds. We think it's the best way to be ;).
Great song - great verse ;). Did we tell you it doesn't get any easier to wait? Just trying to be encouraging here.
Looking back is always the key. Seeing how God worked in the waiting time. Sometime that working is on us. And then again, for somethings there are no answers until we get to heaven.
Praying for you!
Erin, I thought of the same song. Did we grow up together or something?
Mom thinks I should be patient in looking at rescue dogs. I started to pray for my replacement dog two days ago. I started looking today. I want to be patient, but I don't really want to wait for it.
Newlywed zeal. For some reason I thought the two of you had been together for a long, long time.
I love the image of you two dancing in the aisles.
Joylynn, yes - I sure know that feeling. :)
Erin, that would have been from Psalty the singing songbook (was that his name?), I think. I still remember the voice from the records. lol. Those verses are lovely reminders.
Mom, I am not sure that you did tell me that. What I do seem to remember learning somewhere along the line was that prayer for patience usually brought plenty of opportunities to wait. I tend to avoid them. :D
Angie, while you were really replying to Erin... I think it's really easy to try to soothe ourselves and distract ourselves when we are hurting, so sometimes we jump right in with both feet into something we haven't thought a lot about. Sometimes it is disastrous. Sometimes it works out in spite of us. I think you know that I have a lot of compassion for your situation. I just hope you will be open to waiting if your deepest heart tells you it's the right thing to do. I waited until Daniel was ready for a new cat when we lost Zoey, which meant waiting longer than I wanted to... but it also meant that I had healed a bit more by the time we got MooMoo, and I don't regret the wait now. In any event, we're praying for you.
L.L., we're going on 6 years of marriage in about 5 or 6 weeks. That's not an eternity, but I do view it as something of an accomplishment. :D We are still very silly either way.
Speaking of wait...I registered with the Pennsylvania Office of Vocational Rehabilitation last September and it is now that they come up with job leads.
I just sent my resume to the Chester County Intermediate Unit (an uber- bureaucracy serving all the school districts in the county) and was sent an application for instructional assistant (several positions). Pass the prayer, por favor.
I am also facing cataract surgery, the Lord is sure making life interesting in my neighbor- hood! Still chanting those C's and droning those D's in choir.
PS Rachel will be in CA tomorrow (July 16?)through August 5 visiting Tom and her school friends.
Oh, very good ending! You make me laugh.
(Funny that I missed the ending the first time I read this post. Interesting how different things come to the fore depending on our moods. : )
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