Okay, so how cool is it that there is actually an event called "The Hell Hole Swamp Festival"? Very cool. I won't listen to protests to the contrary.
It's not exactly in our backyard here, but it's not so terribly far away in the Palmetto State Low Country. I haven't looked myself, but Daniel tells me that if you locate it on the map, it's "precisely in the middle of nowhere" at the junction of a minor US route and a state highway, and a stone's throw from a town called Old Joe. The swamp/festival apparently derive their not-so-flattering names from a letter from Cornwallis to King George in which he described the locale as "one hell of a hole of a swamp." Those dang nicknames, they have a way of sticking... for centuries.
But the name is far from the only reason why the festival is the epitome of coolness. You must consider the other "family" activities:
+ the 36th annual "Gator Trot" 10K
+ a Bar-B-Que cookoff
+ a talent show
+ a tobacco spitting contest
+ a display of whiskey stills
+ a horseshoe pitching contest
+ a parade
+ arm wrestling
+ Miss, Mrs. and Mr. Hell Hole beauty pageants
+ and... the ever-popular Moonshine Ball
Those are just the highlights. It's not until the first weekend of May, so there is still time to make travel plans...
Part of the beauty of such an event is the fruitful conversation it prompts between my loving stickler of a husband and me. Of course, while I am as fallible as the next person, since I am employed as an editor, I cannot be permitted to make spelling and grammar errors without gentle, well-meaning and good-natured ribbing from him.
Today, I dared to misspell whiskey in a message to him on the subject of the august event. I, without properly referring to Scotch Whisky, spelled it "whisky." I can honestly claim, at least, that I spend so little time actually imbibing the stuff that I could care less how it is spelled in what context. But I digress... Daniel kindly pointed out my mistake, at which point I made some trifling excuse about needing to save up my spelling prowess for my day job. Daniel then cleverly suggested that the whole spelling debacle can be avoided altogether by simply referring to it as "uisquebagh". I knew, knowing Daniel, that this had to be some synonym for whisk(e)y. But since the word was new to me, I did my usual editor thing and looked it up. Oh, snap! The reply was so lovely: you mean "uisquebaugh"? Bothersome vowels! He promptly accused me of being picky.
Balance was thus restored in our corner of the universe.
You see, the most beautiful thing about "The Hell Hole Swamp Festival" is that the mere idea of it expanded my knowledge of language and alcohol culture and brought us closer together as a family. Who can ask for anything more...? ...except perhaps the title of Mrs. Hell Hole.
(It's all yours, Heather... I won't be entering)
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10 comments:
Vwls r nt ncssry.
The festival sounds worth attending!!
Fun post.
Love you!
That sounds like a huge cultural opportunity right there!
For being (mildly) literate, I am an atrocious speller. Spell check is my friend! I have neither the ability nor the patience to edit.
A tobacco spitting contest? Are there that many people that want to participate? And who would want to watch?
How could one endure life without ever being chosen “Mrs. Hell Hole?”
Question to the editor: I hear this said/written both ways, but is it not correct to say, "I couldn't care less." It seems like "could care less" leaves room for some degree of caring. Please advise ;).
Good question Erin.
Life does go on.
Hell Hole sounds a lot more colorful than the Coast Guard Festival, Seaway Festival (Muskegon) or White Lake Fish-o-Rama that I grew up with.
(I deliberately left out the state so you could have some fun looking for it.)
And as wild as Swallow's Day cowboys.
Forget the whisky/whiskey flap and get bourbon.
:-) (No, I don't drink it either.
Commenting here but it really should have been posted a couple posts back. I read Kristin Lavransdatter years ago. I thought it was a well kept secret that it existed. It was recommended to me by a librarian who attended WHBC. It was her favorite book. She was ultra conservative. Maybe she likes penance.
Erin --
The correct form is "I couldn't care less." After all, if you could care less, why don't you?
Yes! He made an account... the grammar czar has spoken, Erin. By the way - I agree. :)
N
I am also in agreement. Most people say it incorrectly (I could care less).
It's like saying, "That's a whole nother issue." I cringe when I see "nother" in the dictionary - it's only use is in that specific phrase. Please say, "That's a whole different issue," or maybe, "That's another issue altogether." I would even accept, "That's a whole other issue." :D
Let English be beautiful and express what we really mean!
The Hell Hole Swamp Festival is actually held in Jamestown, South Carolina.
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